for Lionel

[tooktheblack]

"He probably doesn't," Jon said. He noticed the brush of Lionel's hand and locked his fingers in his for a moment to squeeze it before dropping his own hand again. Just enough to let the other boy know he'd felt it but not so much as to be overt in public.

"Ghost, to the woods? I'll be home later. Go to Summerfell." The direwolf didn't seem entirely pleased but Jon imagined he'd be less pleased if he stuck around so it was a decent enough trade-off.

Comments

[wearestars]

Lionel is pretty sure he just witnessed the Westeros equivalent of locking the dog out of the room so that you can have sex. He'd really like to feel bad for Ghost, who may have just given them both the stank eye, but the whole situation is so absurd that it's all Lionel can do to mostly bite back his smile. There's something about sending the wolf away, too, that makes what's happening seem all the more real, even moreso than the brief squeeze of Jon's fingers.

"It's just past the Compound, up here," Lionel says, and slides Jon a sidelong glance as they walk.

[tooktheblack]

"Summerfell is much further away," Jon admitted. "I sort of like that, considering it gives me a chance to be away from so much activity. I don't think I could live in the actual Compound for very long without going mad. Far more people than I'm used to on a daily basis and I'm sort of surly."

Perhaps that was an understatement; other than a few people, of which he counted Lionel in their number, his patience for small talk was very small indeed and he wasn't very good at getting to know other people.

"Much better with wolves than people."

[wearestars]

"Surly?" Lionel echoes with a hiccup of laughter. "No, Jon. A little stoic, maybe. Reticent. Not surly. Surly involves rudeness." Many things Jon may be, but rude is definitely not one of them. Lionel has his doubts that anyone so concerned with propriety and following rules could ever be.

[tooktheblack]

"Clearly you've never been under my command," Jon said, laughing lightly. "I think others might have a different opinion."

He reached for his hand again, though, and squeezed it lightly. This was very new, the idea of intimacy with someone after Ygritte as much as the idea of intimacy with another man but it felt right, for the moment, and Jon was willing to accept it.

[wearestars]

Lionel's mouth opens to frame the obviously necessary quip about being under Jon's command, only to have the words catch in his throat at the brush of Jon's fingers against his own. Back home, despite the cool, cynical exterior, all he'd ever really wanted was something like this: Affection, appreciation, maybe a little bit of romance. With everything that's happened, the gesture hits him particularly hard, but he doesn't hesitate or give Jon any room to doubt himself. He catches the other boy's hand more firmly before he can pull it away, and tugs Jon hastily off the boardwalk and onto a small dirt path through the trees.

"It's right through here," he says, grateful again for how close his hut is to the Compound.

[tooktheblack]

"We're in luck, then. Not that this sort of thing should really be rushed."

Jon, admittedly, didn't know much about having a relationship but as he'd pointed out on several occasions back home, he did know where to stick it and he wasn't completely clueless about the ways that two people could come together. How he and Lionel would go about it exactly, he didn't know, but he did look forward to it.

"Unless that's how you do things where you're from?"

[wearestars]

"It depends," Lionel replies as they step into the little clearing. His hut is modest but well kept, and it's possible Lionel has never been more grateful for his need to keep things neat. "In general, I guess that's true, but sometimes it can be fun to rush a little." He tosses Jon another coy glance over his shoulder and then hurries up the steps.

"It's not all about what I do or don't do, though," he points out, hand poised on the front door knob. "You do get a say in all this, you know."

[tooktheblack]

"Well aside from knowing the basic mechanics, I'm no expert," Jon admitted readily. "So if you're looking for finesse or skill, I likely don't have it, and I hope I can augment that with desire and eagerness."

He drew close enough to stand next to Lionel, though, and touched his shoulder. "We'll see where it goes?"

[wearestars]

In an instant, Lionel feels beyond idiotic for having been so insecure earlier. If there had been any doubt as to whether Jon was fully capable of understanding and acting on what he wants, that's been utterly obliterated by a handful of words and a touch that's not precisely possessive but definitely not lacking in purpose.

"Finesse and skill are overrated," Lionel says in a rush, and one hand's pushing open the door while the other's seized hold of Jon by the belt to pull him inside it.

[tooktheblack]

That was decisive and Jon was grateful for it. Lionel being decisive about what he wanted meant that Jon didn't have to and while he wanted and wanted more than he had in a long time, it was still a heavy thing to consider whether or not being with Lionel actually constituted breaking his oaths.

The oaths said no wives and no sons, though, and Lionel was neither. Most of the men at the Wall frequented brothels on their rare free time but Jon felt like this was different entirely. A nameless man or woman in a brothel wasn't the same as a close, trusted friend for whom he had feelings.

Once inside, though, Jon tried to push that down and reached for Lionel instead. "Kiss me before I start thinking too much?"

[wearestars]

That's not bad advice, even Lionel at risk for doubts if he lingers too long without action. Fortunately, Jon's hands are already on him; it's only a matter of closing the little distance between them and doing what he's been asked. Everything gets instantly pushed from his head in lieu of the warmth of Jon's mouth and the easy way their bodies align when Lionel draws him in close. For a moment, the sheer tangibility of what's happening is so overwhelming that Lionel loses himself in it, swaying forward as he whimpers a soft, keening sound past Jon's lips.

[tooktheblack]

It was different, kissing a man, but since Jon hadn't had much experience in kissing period, it wasn't so different that he couldn't learn how to shift his expectations.

He slid one hand down Lionel's back and pressed lightly to draw their hips flush. This, at least, made sense with what Jon knew as did parting his lips beneath Lionel's to deepen the kiss.

[wearestars]

For nearly as long as Lionel's understood what sex was, he's been pragmatic about it. There's something entirely different about being with someone you genuinely want, though, someone you're desperate to want you back. It's like all that sexual tension sings through your whole body in a rush, and it isn't just the mechanics of getting off anymore. When Jon pulls him in and their hips clash, Lionel feels it absolutely everywhere.

Deft fingers shift down to Jon's hips and slide beneath the hem of his shirt, first barely skimming over the warm skin beneath and then the whole of his palm pressing firm. When you want something this badly, it's not easy to wait, but he reins himself in anyway, keeping his hands where they are despite how they want to stray up across Jon's chest and down under the waistband of his trousers.

[tooktheblack]

"What do you expect of this, then?"

It was a bit gruff because kissing him hadn't left Jon completely unaffected and any uncertainty he had about what they were doing didn't show in his body's response. That seemed to have a very direct idea about where to go next.

"I have to rely on you to take the lead, if that's something you're comfortable with?"

[wearestars]

What Lionel expects and what Lionel wants are two distinctly different things; in love, he learned a very long time ago to be pragmatic. He doesn't know if Jon means the question in the more general sense, or if that heady, rough edge to his voice simply implies right now, but it doesn't really matter. For Lionel, too used to catching what bliss he can when he finds it, they're one and the same.

He has to swallow before he can answer, mouth still full with the way Jon tastes, like for a moment it isn't his own anymore.

"That is so not a problem," he insists, voice confident but gone breathy, his skin flushed with want. "Just…" he begins, but doesn't immediately finish, his mouth finding Jon's again as he backs him against the door and puts confident fingers to work unfastening the other boy's trousers.

"Just let me," he whispers, lips drawing away from Jon's as he sinks to his knees with a motion so smooth it has to have come from practice.

[tooktheblack]

It was something that Ygritte had done for him and he'd done it for her in turn but it was different when it was a cock, Jon thought. It wasn't something he knew how to do offhand, anyway, and he thought perhaps it was best Lionel had gone first.

But that was the last he thought, really, because the sight of him on his knees to do that sort of took his breath away. He did manage to lightly thread his fingers in Lionel's hair, just resting and not pulling.

[wearestars]

It's only been three months, maybe four since Lionel did this with anyone, but with the way his body is so suddenly clamoring for it, you'd think it had been years. His fingers are steady and swift, and when he works Jon's pants and underwear down hips and thighs, Lionel's breath catches at the sight of him, stiff and pink and so abruptly real mere inches from his face. He's never given head to an uncircumcised guy before, this should be interesting.

His eyes flick briefly up to Jon's as he takes him in hand, but once his fingers find that hard flesh, Lionel doesn't have the willpower to wait even a moment more, ducking immediately in to take Jon's cock past warm, practiced lips.

[tooktheblack]

It felt good, amazing, and a little forbidden considering the Wall and his oath to the Watch but Jon didn't think that this with Lionel constituted breaking the oath. He wasn't thinking much about it, at any rate, and was more concentrating on how soft Lionel's mouth was and how Jon's knees threatened to give out on him.

He let out a sound that was halfway between a groan and a whimper: wordless, but full of meaning all the same. He'd never really wanted this much in a long while.